a LiTTLe CoNFeSsiOnS .

babe ! this post was made especially for my bestmate ever . law liat , i'll never forget you . never ever . i met you almost everyday but then i could do nothing than just pray in the deep of my heart for your happiness , healthy life . besarnya pengorbanan yg perlu aku lakukan , mahalnya harga yg perlu aku bayar utk mempertahankan sebuah hubungan persahabatan . Allah jea tau betapa seksanya aku nak buat mcm tak kenal ko instead ko dah jd a part of my life . that's the fact . sorry to said . i just said wat i was act feel now . my mum once said . we have to put our best in our friendship . we must be sincere . no matter what happen , we have to defend the friendship even though we thought that we have no way else . ma , i have tried my best . but then sorry , i think i'm failed . i couldn't defend the ship well . i am lost ! seems like it was yesterday when i met you , we are laughing together , spent our quality time together . if only i knew what will happen next . i will never ever come to your life , disturb ur life or maybe ruin ur peace life . thank you for all you've done . forgive all my mistakes . there's nothing i can do . to hear ur voice again . sometimes i want to call you . but i know u won't be there . i'm sorry for blaming you for everything . i've hurt myself . and maybe you too . sometimes it was very hard to pretend like we're happy enough but then we're not . i don't want to admit that but then it was you i need . it was hard to say goodbye when it comes to this ! would you tell me i was wrong ? would you help me understand ? there's nothing i can do . to look into your eyes and see you are looking back . have i got that chance ? maybe i should accept the fact that the answer would be NO . if i had just one more day , i would tell you how much that i need u since you've been away . it's so out of line to try to turn back time . i miss you ! i miss our time together . once you have been my best friend , the title will remain as it should be . forever . never ever be faded with time . even maybe u have totally throw me away from your life , but then you are still my best friend until the end of the world . u will be remembered as the person who brought the strongness in mine , who were never be tired of giving me inspiration and motivation , protect me as best as u can , who tell me that i couldn't be like this , like that , i have to change and so on . i appreciated everything that u have done for the sake of me . but sayangnya , aku tak dapat semua tuh lg . but if this was the risk that i have to take , the right decision utk kebaikan semua org , utk kebahagiaan org lain , termasuk ko , aku rela dan sanggup berkorban . even maybe aku sendiri tak bahagia . its okay . kebahgiaan org lain tuh penting buat aku . thnx for evrything . thnx sbb sudi jd kwn baek aku even tak lama pun . klw aku ada peluang utk meminta , i demand for your come back . mustahil kan ? if u think so , abaikan permintaan aku neyh . sorry for everything . bukan berniat nak buat ko rasa serba salah , tapi i'm just expressing myself . yg merasakan kekurangan dan kehilangan yg amat sangat . for me best friends and org-org yg bermakna dlm idup aku tuh mcm jigsaw puzzle . melengkapkan idup aku . ilang sekeping , mesti tak lengkap puzzle kan ? tak lengkap tak ley nak frame kan ? pincang dan cacat . dats wat i was . sorry . thank you .

From the bottom of my heart

Fitrah Ilyana